Saturday, June 18, 2011

Happy Aniversity, Far-Eviler!

a year ago, i joined hitRECord in a grand gesture 'to expand my horizons', etc. It was really an act of weakness-- I couldn't take on paying work anymore because I started dropping things, getting cramps & spasms from doing everyday things, I'd get tremors that'd sometimes last for days. I felt broken, unreliable & false when people wanted to talk shop.

I dunno what I thought it'd be like. I'd never really collaborated before; I thought it meant losing control. Since I was losing that anyway... I uploaded only things made for personal use, things I loved but was never going to get a chance to put them to use. I figured playing around with these RECorder's would placate artist-smartist self.

The word 'small' I doesn't begin to describe my thinking, but the word "Tiny" began to have a much better ring to it.

It's been a year; Fibromyalgia looks likely to be the culprit of my deterioration but with no really-for-real answer there is no satisfaction in the knowing this but there is satisfaction in getting this.



I hadn't seen it in print, so I wasn't certain. I hadn't known what I was getting into but then I never really do. I'm a published artist now, I'm handicapped, I am not giving up, I'm frightened everyday, I am certain this is not the end, I am grateful were it to be.

also, this guy here who signs my checks, you know My Boss is more Awesome than yours will ever be.